An Early Struggle

One of my big struggles in early recovery was I kept hanging out with people who used. Now it seems silly, but at the time they were my friends, the only people I really knew. And I used around them because I was so worried about being accepted by them.

Fortunately, I followed the advice of the people in the meetings to hang out with them afterwards, go out for coffee, etc. Then I had sober friends, and I didn't have to worry about the whole using thing. And I also found out I was able to have fun and be sociable -- and/or talk about what was really going on in my life.

Later, when I was stable in recovery, I could hang out with some of the old crowd, but in specific conditions. Like if they were meeting at a bar, I wouldn't go. If they were going to a baseball game, maybe. If they had a party scheduled for 7, I'd show up at 7 and leave when the drinking vibe got going. And, lo and behold, they accepted me anyway!

So this is a good reminder, because I still worry too much about what other people think and get myself into trouble as a result.